St. Nicholas
I just got back from violin lesson and damn am I disappointed /: I did a really good job of my Vivaldi impetus passage but all my teacher did was give a grunt and start commenting about dynamics at the front of the songgg. Rah grah I practised that passage really hard!!!
& He was talking about how I shouldn't play so roughly etc. Hahaha, WengChen is bad influence tsk!
Anyway I took the bus many times today. Let's count:
1. From school to AMK central
2. From AMK central to ACSI
3. From ACSI to Macs at King Albert's Park (or something like that)
4. From Macs to AMK hub
5. From AMK hub to home
6. From home to AMK hub (and then walk to violin teacher's house)
7. From AMK hub back home (after violin lesson)
And that is a grand total of 55cents times 7 = WOW $3.85.
I can almost buy a KFC student meal with that!!!
Oh and I swear I'm the clumsiest ass ever (apart from Mary-Anne of course). I tripped twice on the stairs at macs. I tumbled right off the bus when I got home and landed with a "WHOAAA" at the bus stop. That kinda earned me a couple of weird looks from the people at the bus stops and a few sniggers from toddlers. Boy, I must have been a sight.
To top if off, on the way to my violin teacher's house, in a valent attempt to protect my darling violin, I hit my hand against the poles on the bus and let off a YELP. I sounded like a tormented dog. That's a bad thing right, right.
Anyway on a side note, ACSI IB talk today was sort of umm pointless hahaha, considering that we were one hour late. Damn extra lessons. But macs with yellows were crazy as usual. :D
I still want to go ACSI /: but why are the fees so goddamn high ): I don't want to be a financial burden to my parents!
On the other hand, I'm checking out RJC's DSA now. And there are like 2 options for you to DSA under: Aesthetics and Sports. Okay this is so great, we can't DSA under academic! Well actually that kinda makes sense, they get smart people from O LEVEL anyway. Why would they wanna DSA academically excelling students -.-
But I'm really reluctant to DSA under Aesthetics! I think I'll just be the joke of the day at auditions and well umm, music has so many strings attached (OOH how ironic, my violin has many strings attached too). Like if you get in under aesthetics DSA, you must take MEP join a particular CCA, etc etc. I don't want to take MEP in JC eew gross!
In addition, I'm checking out hwachong's DSA as well. And I'm wondering if Hwachong Institution = Hwa Chong JC cause I can't find a website for hcjc /: crap neverminddd. I gotta fill in my NJC DSA form and hand it up asap /:
So annoying, so many things to do but so little time. I must remember to write "programme notes" for my violin duets! ): I keep forgetting shitz.
OHMYGOD I HAVEN'T DONE ALKENES STRUCTURED AND THERE'S CHEMISTRY TOMORROW.
>:( I'M TIRED.
Swinged it at;
9:21 PM
I'll try to make sure this ain't another emo post (:
Got our PPRs back today, and I was pretty satisfied with it until I showed it to my dad. He started saying how I should start considering which polytechnic I can go to, and forget about raffles / hwachong / national JC. That sort of pissed me off I think, because nobody believes I can do it. And now I'm starting to think I can't too /:
On the more positive side, its the official end of term 2. (although holiday lessons are aplenty) But well, I shall go out for the first time in a thousand months tomorrow!
Movies at ChiaErn's with Chiaern Lianna Amanda!
I'm sick of typing, I'm kinda disappointed archuletta didn't win, but I guess I expected Cook to win so rah.
I want to sleep.
Swinged it at;
10:08 PM
HURRR I'M FRUSTRATED.
WHY IS IT SO DIFFICULT TO GET ONE BLOODY PASSAGE RIGHT.
WHY CAN'T I SLIDE PROPERLY AND PLAY IN TUNE.
WHY CAN'T I CROSS STRINGS WITHOUT HITTING OTHER STRINGS AS WELL.
WHY CAN'T I PLAY RUNNING NOTES SMOOTHLY.
WHY CAN'T I DO GODDAMN SYNCOPATIONS.
WHY CAN'T I DO A NICE VIBRATO ON MY FOURTH FINGER.
currently, my head is drowning in a thousand "why"s, "urgh"s but no "because"s. i need to study geography but i can't concentrate cause i can't stop thinking about how mep practical is in 2 weeks time and i'm neither ready for violin nor piano, nevermind duet ): hurrr, its not as if i'm not trying. i am! but it's not working damnit.
in addition, i'm going to practice with accompaniment for violin with rebecca ho coming thursday and i really don't want to waste her time! i must get my vivaldi and faure right no matter what.
i hate it so much when people look at me and go "well lucky you, you've got music to help you". apparently, in their eyes, being able to play the violin earns you a one-way ticket to a top jc and a top university.
well excuse me, there are at least a billion violinists out there. i'm like a freaking weed in the middle of a bouquet of flowers when compared to those violinists. besides, i do pay a price for being a violinist. i spend time practicing, rehearsing, etc etc. it's not as if we MEP girls can just pick up a goddamn instrument and play out a virtuosic piece for you.
i hate it when people look at MEP girls and go "well lucky you, you've got MEP to pull you through" before they start ranting on about how they only got an A2 for some humanities, whining and whining away while we sit there and think "well thats nice, i haven't been able to pass any of my humanities and i'm currently scoring a d7 for mep despite putting in one hour of effort daily. i wonder what you do during that hour i spend on my violin?"
i hate it when people don't understand the amount of time we spend on music, amount of effort we put in just to play a musical instrument. they just think you lead the most carefree life ever, before they look at you and say with envy "well lucky you, you've got music to help you"
i hate it when people don't understand how much time they actually do have on their hands. they go "yknow i didn't manage to study enough yesterday! oh no i'm going to fail" and when you reply sympathetically "me too" they turn around and tell you to shut up. and of course, you've guessed it, they'll say "but it's okay for you. lucky you, you've got music to help you"
seriously, are these people blind, stupid or just plain self-centred!? i'm not some immortal who has nothing to complain about you know. just because i go to school smiling everyday doesn't mean life is smooth-sailing for me. so please for goodness sake, stop saying "well lucky you, you've got music to help you" or i won't be held accountable if you recieve a tight slap across your smug face.
the problem with music is you've got to be DAMN BLOODY GOOD if you actually want to be able to excel in it. being average isn't enough. i'm in a foul mood so i hope these people would just shut up and stop glaring at you whenever you wish to speak about your troubles, before moving on to say "what are you complaining about, you've got music to help you"
argh
what's wrong with these people
whats wrong with me >:(
Swinged it at;
3:16 PM
Please continue praying for RongXuan. I'm reminded of her everytime I look at my Haydn book and as we all very well know, she doesn't deserve to be in such a situation at such an age (nor any other age). Updates on string blog on her condition! Smses will also be flying around the orchestra. She's showing improvement already! So we shall all pray very very harddd.
----
Geography test on tuesday and I should get started. But then again I'd better do my chemistry / physics assessment since tomorrow is one of those few rare days when I can get help for science from my aunt. Yet the annoying thing is, I forgot to bring my chemistry textbook home /: & my aunt is such a stickler to textbooks. She'll probably hammer me tomorrow urgh.
Y'know, I really envy those with tuition teachers at their beck and call. It's amazing what money can do in today's society.
Okay basically, I'm blogging to procrastinate. I don't want to start chemistry or physics, nor geography for that matter.
& Mary-Anne is such a jackass, she has switched back to wordpress and hur I'm not going to bother to relink.
Come to think of it, sec4s only have 4 sessions of cca (inclusive of JUBILATE) left till step down. I guess thats kinda sad yet relieving at the same time. CCAs can be so tiring, but yet it'll be almost awkward to not have to go for orchestra practices every tuesday and friday. Oh no, getting sentimental.
Anyway on a happier note, night study with
Lianna on wednesday night was rather productive. Did our history notes cornell note-taking style. Just wanted to try out the cornell thingy thing, but I'm not sure if it really makes a difference when I study. It feels more organized though.
Hahaha. On the flipside, night study with Lianna on thursday night was sort of productive in a different, non-academic way. Most of the night was spent staring at Lianna who was talking incessantly (Credit to Mary-Anne for this word) while she rambles on at the speed of a bullet train in Japan with random breaks in between where she stares at me with that look of hers and go "HOW JESSICA HOW". But I guess I was almost effective because I forced her to face the problem head on :D
So Lianna, stop thinking about what will happen if you do this or what will happen if you do that. Just do it, you never know till you try. Desperate situations call for desperate solutions.
But most of all, remember that:
if you want to cry, cry on my shoulder. I'll be here for you if you need me!
Hurrr MEP practical in like 2 weeks time and I'm so NOT ready /: I can't even do goddamn syncopation properly without screwing uppp. Not to mention, my string crossing for vivaldi is still a mess, position shifting for faure is gibberish and conflicting rhythms for divertimento is utter rubbish.
Oh and I just realised that I'm starting to use these 4 words in my everyday speech very frequently: Vivaldi, Faure, Divertimento and Syncopation.
All right, I need to get started whether I like it or not. Grrrr, geography /:
Swinged it at;
5:19 PM
I realised I'm one of the few who haven't got around to posting about PSA. Anyway, Coach Elgin was really corny (corn in the corner!?) and bloody hell, the coaches share jokes! Like the fan club in the canteen. -.-
But I thought the ultimate joke was the one where he asked "Which movie makes you wait the longest?" and all of us just stared at him dumbfounded & incredulous when he finally uttered the answer.
Moreover, he had all those funny energisers like big fish and SMALL FISH. & I got a blueblack from playing that squirrel game /: owww. But he was really good, very motivational and all. And hahahaha I took two days to get his mock paper joke -.- I arrived in school on monday, was stoning and suddenly started laughing hilariously.
But anyway point is he was really effective and on the first day when we were invited to share our fears, I wanted to but then ironically, one of my biggest fears is speaking in public. -.- Second day was equally exciting when we found out about our personalities. When I read the S personality I suddenly like thought of alot of yellows. People like Mary-Anne Huiting Cassandra. But I never thought I would be remotely related to being an S.
My personality was quite predictable I guess, CS :D but what was most coincidental was that almost our entire clique had C dominant! (CI, CS) Except for Huiting (She's an S) and Chiaern (who's an I). Yupp 4D didn't have a single person who's a D (imagine that)!
Then 3rd day was quite draggy but I think the Cornell note taking system really is quite smart! The part with the main points on the left and summary at the bottom for easy reference :D & I'm a audio visual learner, I realised. I'm rather left-brained which explains why I can't excel in music for nuts.
Anyway it's been a week and i think all the motivation has drained out of me (just like everybody else I suppose). But our class still kinda miss Coach Elgin with all the corniness in the atmosphere. Jocelyn & huiyi are the worst tablemates you can ever have, trust me. they're such annoying jackasses :D
Argh so much for a motivational workshop! Just like coach said "there's something seriously wrong if you need somebody to motivate you. Friends, you have to motivate yourself. Nobody else can do that for you." Annoying how true that statement is aye?
----
Okay on a less-PSA note, school's like usual, physics test and Amaths test on thursday next week.
I really have to start doing something about my violin duet (especially divertimento ughh). & Vivaldi ): I can't play those running passages where you have to like cross from G string to E string at the beginning of every two bars. ): & Faure's Berceuse with all the slides and harmonics. It's so hard to achieve the emotion for that stupid piece /:
I have to get around to memorising Bach properly too shitz.
On a happier note, only 6 months of mugging left! I can't wait for O Levels to be overrr.
Life sucks, but sometimes it's a good thing because you can never taste happiness without tasting hardship first.
Swinged it at;
1:03 PM